.....I am nervous and cautious. I hate making mistakes. I'd rather not try, then try and make a mistake. I'm trying to fix that. Because it feels better at the end, to have flopped miserably, but to say that I attempted something new and scary than to sit in the same lump and remain unchanged.
Things from new recipes, new ideas, new crafts, and sadly even behavior changes. I wish I could be as bold about changing my behavior as I was about joining a new league in town with a bunch of players that I have never met.
Why do I remain scared? Why should I stay locked up in fear?
It feels so liberating to thrust out and tempt the unknown.
I love being spontaneous, but I allow fear or guilt about first getting all and every chore done at home before I go out to explore.
I want to get in the car on a date with my husband and have no particular destination in mind, just drive and talk and see where that takes us.
I want to walk into a room full of people with a confident smile on my face and easy laughter.
I wish I could finish the books I have half-written. That would be such an adventure.
No longer will I keep allowing "tomorrow", "later", "not now", or even, "I'm tired" to be the legislative stronghold in my mind.
It will be "today", "now", and "why not?!".
Because the hardest part is just the beginning....
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